Larry the cable guy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dPXyEU5a94c

I’m sponsorin’ one of them starvin’ kids. You ever done that? Lemme (let me) tell you summ’n (something), this is the biggest rip-off known to man, and Ilike to help people out. And I was doin’ it for three years. I was sponsorin’. I adopted one of them (argot pour these/those) pygmies down there. Alright. Seriously, lemme tell you some true story.I get a letter in the mail the other day. Certified letter. Alright. The kid that I adopted busted up a bunch of stuff and I gotta pay for the damages. Seven million pygmies, I got the gang member.Ain’t that summ’n? I oughta (ought to) fly down there and stick my boot up old boobla boobla’s ass. This is what I oughta do. Now I gotta fly down there and go to parent-teacher conferences! D’youbelieve me? What am I gonna say down there? How y’all (=you all, typiquement du sud) doin’? blblblblbl blbblblb tttktktktkttktkt. What the hell? I did get a letter from him, though. I did get a letter fromboobla boobla. And I sent boobla boobla a care package. And Boobla Boobla sent me this letter back. Says here, “Dear Larry the Cable Guy. Thanks so much for the flush waters. They s…They sure come inhandy on them muggy nights. I appreciate the playstation but there ain’t no place to plug it in, down here. Why can’t they make a button that just says ‘pass?’ My brother Booble Babble Booble got hitin the head last night by a flour bag during a food drop.” He’s havin’ a rough week down there! “I shrunk a missionary head last night and put it on a stick. So you’ll be gettin’ this as soon as UPSstarts delivery again down here. The last driver ended up in a kettle of taters and roots (tater=potato, en gros ils l’ont fait cuire avec la soupe hahaha). Tomorrow we’re gonna go hippo gigging” It’slike frog gigging (sorte de chasse à la grenouille avec une espèce de lance) but with hippos. “Last time I hurt my back cause they made me carry the decoys. Mom’s all excited cause they’re gonna…